Tears of darkness
by ammstar11
Summary: So this is Nico's stroy based on the song Dog Days by Within Temptation. I really thought it suited Nico and his life so I kind of summed up his life based on the Lyrics. It gets pretty emotional. mostly Nico's inner thoughts and fears and doubts. Then a happy ending because I love them so much. More inside.


**Tears of darkness**

 **Song: Dog days by Within Temptation**

 **This song really makes me think of Nico, especially since at first I thought the words were _tears of darkness_ instead of _these are the dog days._ Still works though. I had to sit here listening to the song over and over to get the lyrics right because every web search turned up different lyrics and none of them were right. I'm going to try and cover Nico's life in parts from about _Battle for the Labyrinth_ up to _Blood of Olympus_ and just past that so be ready for time jumps.**

 ** _(Wake up in the dead of night, Dogs are turning white)_**

Nico wakes up and looks around for any sign of danger, but finds himself alone, he's always been alone ever since Bianca died and he ran away from camp. For a time he had the ghosts of the underworld to keep him company but ever since that incident with Minos he's preferred to be alone. Once in a while he's visited by Hestia the Goddess of the hearth, she keeps him company for a time but she never stays for long. Sometimes Mrs. O'Leary comes to see him, he likes that there is actually an animal that isn't afraid of him even if she is a Hell hound.

 ** _(Running to what's wrong each time_**

 ** _Failed to get it right)_**

Nico wonders if every choice he makes is the wrong one, first he wondered if looking up to Percy and trusting him to keep Bianca safe was the right choice, she had died even though Percy had promised that she would be okay. He had wondered if it was the right choice to save Percy even though Percy had not protected Bianca, and Nico had run away with his heart broken and confused feelings.

He wondered why he had believed that Minos would help him when he wanted to try and bring Bianca back; that had been a mistake. He had wandered around lost in the Labyrinth alone and scared because he had made the wrong choice of where to put his trust. Still he had returned to Percy and offered to help him, he didn't want Percy hurt even if he still resented Percy a little he couldn't fully hate him. Why had he thought it would be a good idea to have Percy take on the curse of Achilles?

And why had he believed that his father didn't mean Percy any harm when he told Nico to make a side trip to Hades' palace on the way to the river Styx? Yes he wanted to know the truth about his mother but he didn't mean for his father to trap Percy, why couldn't he just help without things going wrong?

 ** _(Fighting off this heavy heart_**

 ** _Keeping your head high)_**

In the end he had managed to bring the reinforcements needed to protect Olympus but had he really done enough? He was happy to be welcomed back at camp despite everyone now knowing that he was the son of Hades, that he was the Ghost King. But that welcome didn't last. He left the camp again and instead worked for his dad as the _ambassador of Pluto_ at the Roman camp while keeping both camps a secret from one another, it was easy considering no one really liked to approach him.

When the doors of death were open he had gone into the underworld to try and see Bianca again maybe bring her back this time but he couldn't because she had chosen to be reborn, he was happy that she had the chance to live again but he would never see her ever again and that broke his heart even more. But when he had lost hope, that was when he stumbled upon Hazel and found out that he had another sister, one that he could help; So he did what he had planned to do for Bianca and he brought Hazel back to the land of the living. He had taken her to camp Jupiter where she could be safe and this time he could protect his sister.

 ** _(Oh, won't you please forget?_**

 ** _Oh, won't you please forget?)_**

No matter how hard he tried he just couldn't erase the pain of the past, or feel like he truly belonged anywhere, he had been taken from his own time, he had lost his family, he had lost his memories, and he had lost his home. He had no friends to call his own, and he couldn't be of much help to anyone because no one seemed to trust him.

 ** _(These are the dog days_**

 ** _These are the dog days_**

 ** _Leading our hearts astray)_**

He took it upon himself to track down the doors of death, he was the son of Hades so he should be able to do it, maybe then he could be of some help to those around him. He would do it no matter what he told himself.

He had told himself that he could handle the task of finding the doors but he had never anticipated being dragged into Tartarus itself in the process, but he couldn't turn back now no matter how scared he was. He had to do this, he had to. He was the only one who could.

 ** _(These are the dog days_**

 ** _These are the dog days_**

 ** _Soon they will fade away)_**

Tartarus was the worst hell beyond imagining but he had made it almost to the doors and knew that he had done well, but he couldn't have foreseen the giants capturing him when he was so close to his goal, and now they were going to use him to lure in his sister and her friends and if they got them too, there would be no hope left. This was his fault he knew, because of him people he cared about would be hurt and there was nothing he could do to stop it.

 ** _(1, 2, 3, 4_**

 ** _What are you waiting for?)_**

Trapped in the jar all he could do was put himself into the death trance brought on by the seeds of pomegranates from the underworld, while he slept he dreamt. And what he dreamed only worried him more and more. And he couldn't do anything about it.

When he was finally rescued he couldn't do anything to help. He felt so useless and he felt like his soul might shatter as he watched as Percy and Annabeth were pulled down into Tartarus, into the worst kind of hell, a hell he had seen fist hand and still all he could do was promise Percy that he would lead the others to the doors, that he would help them.

He had helped them retrieve the sceptre, but at what price? His deepest secret was out and his soul felt crushed, he couldn't look at Jason in the eyes. He didn't know how to handle anything so he kept himself apart, kept himself separate, just as he always had.

When the doors of death had finally been released he still couldn't rest easy, none of them could. There was still too much to do and no one knew how to get it done. Finally he made his decision to help anyway he could no matter the cost, as long as he could help. So he set out with Reyna and Cotch Hedge to take the Athena Parthenos back to camp to stop the coming war. Even if it cost him everything he would come through for everyone.

 ** _(1, 2, 3, 4_**

 ** _What are you waiting for?)_**

As he traveled with Reyna and Hedge, he grew to like them but didn't know what to make of it because nothing good could come of their being near him, nothing good ever came of having him around but he was ready to change that.

Each time something happened and he thought he would lose the people he had grown to care for he couldn't think straight, he couldn't control himself and he had done things that he never imagined he could or would ever do. He didn't know how to think of himself anymore. What would he do? Where would he go? Who could he turn to? Could he finally go to his father for help? He had said that he had hoped that Nico could be an acceptation, that he could be a child of Hades that could be happy, but could he ever be happy? He didn't know.

 ** _(These are the dog days_**

 ** _These are the dog days)_**

This was it, the war was about to begin, there wasn't much time and he had to make a choice. Here and now he would give everything he had to protect the place that he couldn't help but care about, couldn't stand to see destroyed. Even if he would never be accepted here he had to keep it and those within its borders safe. It was the least he could do. It was all he wanted to do.

Before he could carry out his plan he had been stopped and dragged into a new mess but deep down he guessed that it wasn't so bad, if he was going to die today it might as well be while fighting alongside comrades than all alone fading away to shadows and nothingness. At least this way he might be able to help more people.

Had he made the wrong choice again? His father had told him that some deaths could not be avoided, that some deaths were meant to happen. He had wondered if maybe those words had been meant for him, now he understood, but he wasn't sure he preferred it this way.

 ** _(Awaken by the dreams at night_**

 ** _Chills run down your spine)_**

Nico wakes up panting, another nightmare- they just don't quit. He looks around at the darkness of the infirmary knowing that he's finally safe at camp. But the nightmares keep coming. He lies back down and tries to close his eyes without seeing those images over and over and tries to block out those voices telling him about all his faults and how he's no real hero. He fights back the shadows surrounding him but doesn't know how long he can hold out. This is when he's most vulnerable and he can't escape his mind.

 ** _(The brightest star in summer skies_**

 ** _Brings madness to our minds)_**

He knows that it's all over, that these are just memories but he still can't escape the pain and fear that lingers ever near and never stopping. He doesn't know how he'll be able to fight it or for how long.

 ** _(Fighting off the darkest thoughts_**

 ** _Fighting to survive)_**

Suddenly there is light and it grounds him, just as the hand now in his helps him stay here and now listening to the voice telling him that it's alright now, it's all going to be alright. He opens his eyes and looks over to see Will watching him closely, worriedly, while he holds his hand firmly but tenderly, a feeling almost foreign but not lost to Nico.

 ** _(Oh, won't you please forget?_**

 ** _Oh, won't you please forget?)_**

Nico explains that he was woken by his nightmares and Will tightens his hold on Nico's hand slightly but it not painful, just comfortingly. He explained the nightmares as best he could because he knew Will would listen and he wanted to trust him.

"I just want you to be able to escape the pain, I know you can't forget it, but I'll help you fight it. I'm right here with you so don't give up." Nico feels tears run down his face at those words, only recently had people started to show him kindness like this, to show that they cared. He was still unsure how to deal with these kinds of things but he couldn't help the happiness he felt.

 ** _(These are the dog days_**

 ** _These are the dog days_**

 ** _Leading our hearts astray)_**

"I won't let you leave, and I won't let you be alone anymore, so you have nothing to be afraid of." Will smiled reassuringly at him while still holding his hand.

 ** _(These are the dog days_**

 ** _These are the dog days_**

 ** _Soon they will fade away)_**

Nico managed a small smile back as he felt his dark thoughts and pain seep away, he wasn't alone anymore. He had family, he had friends, and he had a place he could call home. He wasn't lost anymore.

 ** _(1, 2, 3, 4_**

 ** _What are you waiting for?)_**

"I know." He squeezed Wills hand in return "Thank you."

 ** _(1, 2, 3, 4_**

 ** _What are you waiting for?)_**

"You promise that you will stay here, and that you won't talk about being alone anymore?" Will searched his face and Nico knew what he was looking for, any sign at all that Nico might still leave, that he still felt like he didn't belong. "I promise, no more running. I'm here to stay."

 ** _(These are the dog days_**

 ** _These are the dog days_**

 ** _These are the dog days)_**

Nico sat up in bed and faced Will, he looked him right in the eye as he told Will how he had made up his mind to stay.

 ** _(Embracing the hearts_**

 ** _To fight the loss)_**

Everything had been so hard since he had lost Bianca and he had done everything he could to try and fight the pain but no matter what he had done; no matter where he had turned it had never worked out right.

 ** _(Running down the path that_**

 ** _I think I need to go)_**

He had tried to walk this world alone and that had not worked, he had tried to help but things still didn't go as planned.

 ** _(When you've think you've won_**

 ** _You're still losing after all)_**

He had done everything he could and still it hadn't seemed to be enough, he still wondered if he could have done more. He still doubted himself. Will wasn't too happy about this admission but said nothing.

 ** _(These are the dog days_**

 ** _These are the dog days)_**

Nico squeezed Wills hand once more.

 ** _(1, 2, 3, 4_**

 ** _What are you waiting for?)_**

"Don't worry Will, I'm not going to let those thoughts take over again, I still have a lot of things to work through but I know that I can get through them, eventually."

 ** _(These are the dog days_**

 ** _These are the dog days_**

 ** _Leading our hearts astray)_**

"I know you will, and I'll be here to help you through it, and so with the others. You're not alone anymore so you don't have to fight alone ever again."

 ** _(These are the dog days_**

 ** _These are the dog days_**

 ** _Soon they will fade away)_**

Nico found that he really could believe that, he knew that his new found friends would pull through for him. He trusted them and they trusted him. He had finally found hope of a better future.

 ** _(1, 2, 3, 4_**

 ** _What are you waiting for?)_**

"Thanks Will." He looked at their joined hands and smiled again, the feeling of warmth never left him and he felt like it never would again.

 ** _(1, 2, 3, 4_**

 ** _What are you waiting for?)_**

Will took both of Nico's hands into his and held them close "You're welcome Deathboy, now you should really get some sleep. I don't think those nightmares will be back anytime soon, and I'll stay right here to make sure of that. I promise." Nico nodded as he lay back down while Will held his hand again. "I believe you." He closed his eyes and drifted off to sleep, this time the bad memories and haunting nightmares were gone and instead replaced by the memories he had made so far with the people he cared about, and the dreams of new memories yet to come. All through the night he felt the warm presence near him and he knew he had nothing to fear anymore, he was home and he was safe. He was happy.

 ** _(These are the dog days_**

 ** _These are the dog days_**

 ** _These are the dog days_**

 ** _These are the dog days_**

 ** _These are the dog days_**

 ** _These are the dog days_**

 ** _These are the dog days_**

 ** _These are the dog days_**

 ** _These are the dog days_**

 ** _These are the dog days_**

 ** _These are the dog days_**

 ** _These are the dog days…)_**

 **I might as well finish the song off since I went through all of that trouble to get the lyrics right, anyway I really hope you liked it, I had no idea where I was going with this it just happened.**

 **Please let me know what you think and feel free to correct me on anything if you need to.**

 **I really need to sleep but I really enjoyed writing this even though I was getting really emotional as I was going along.**

 **Like I said when I first heard the song I though the line was _tears of darkness_ instead of** **_these are the dog days_** **but I am satisfied with what I ended up with.**


End file.
